That may sound simple enough but, in all too many cases it's the biggest obstacles we face.  Buddha said, "Anger is poison and an obstacle to enlightenment". Anger is not useful if it is not for reasonable thing.  Anger may destroy you.  Anger may be denied because we feel to guilty about it, or afraid of it.  Here are six steps to healthy Anger Release.


1) Decide what you made Angry -

               Ask yourself the very important Question , Is this worth getting angry over ? If it is a small annoyance that's ticked you off, as it is in the majority of angry episodes, forget it. If you cant forget it, then perhaps the source of your anger goes beyond this simple incident. Ferret out the underlying cause of your hostility. Bring your feelings to the surface and deal with them.


2) Give the "Provoker" the benefit of the doubt -

                Instead of inflaming  your anger by feeling yourself such thoughts as "who does think he is for treating me in this underhanded way " suggest to yourself that perhaps this person is havinhg a bad day. Come up with a reasonable justification for the behaviour - something that you can understand and relate to.

3) Count to Ten

                 Before any action in ager just count to ten or practice  some form of mental relaxation. Most psychologists agree , there is nothing to be gained by an explosive outburst aimed at relation. Calm down first, then discuss the rationally.


4) Make your Grievance known without attacking the other person : 

                 This called tact and some good communication skill. Register your complaint using I instead of you . For example instead of saying you are acting unfairly and you are wrong, It is far more effective to say " I feel hurt . What you are doing doesn't take my needs into account."
  

5) Listen : 

              Another tough technique to master . But really try . Listen hard. and above all , understand. This is the key to step in resolving the conflict is. after all, the key to safely diffusing your anger.


6) Forgive : 

             When you forgive someone (and this includes yourself ), many clearly positive psychological and psychological changes takes place. Yo feel warm and more easily, your heart feels warm and melty , your blood pressure and heart rate drop, you may even cry. But most importantly, through forgiveness you once again experience the love that is the essence of your relationship.  You remember that you care about this person which may be why their behavior hurt so much in the first place   

                  Love is simply the most creative use of our own energy, and there are many ways to channel that that energy eating natural foods, getting aerobic exercise, spending time in unmolested nature, preying mediating but most importantly, giving someone 100% of your attention when you relate to them. Are all effective way to increase loving.  

           Any change, positive or negative, marks the end of a page in your life. Nothing is final in the world. Look around you everything is in the process of changing and growing. To stop changing is to cease living.